Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Backyards without borders

This is our backyard now:

You might notice the distinct lack of fence. This is not entirely our fault, but it does happen to represent our sole contribution to the backyard up to this point. When we moved in the fence was already partly falling down. This was in the home inspection report - Just in case we happened to miss the 50ft of fallen down wood in the middle of the 110ft fence line. Honestly, you might have been too distracted by the dry rot on the back door.
Apparently the popsicle stick fence the builder put up couldn't quite withstand the hurricane force winds that come up from the valley. Shocking.
Regardless, since we had from the very beginning intended to completely landscape the backyard, it seemed silly to replace the fence until we were ready to build. Thus the fence was left in its state of partially standing...for a whole three months.
About three months into owning the house, we get a letter from our home insurance company letting us know our back fence is unsafe and unless we fix it they will revoke our insurance. To paint the picture a bit more, this is the same insurance company that didn't care when shit was coming out of our ceiling because of badly installed toilet upstairs three days after we moved in while the inside of our house was being painted. The same company that didn't care that our dishwasher, refrigerator, garbage disposal all died within weeks of moving in. And would be the same company that would refuse to cover our sewage pump when it broke in another month from the arrival of this letter.
Our fence that backs up to acres of wilderness, with no access to any other houses or roads unless you are already trespassing on our property and have made it past the many hidden pot holes, rocks, loose gravel, thorn bushes, and rattle snakes that make up out back yard. Yes, that fence. It's unsafe? Really?
Picture painted? Good. You can imagine just where fixing this fence rate on our scale of "shower that won't turn off" to "what's that smell coming from the light you just fixed". None the less, the insurance company had a valid point from their perspective and we didn't want to lose the insurance in case it would one day actually cover something. After much discussion we agreed the only logical thing to do would be to dismantle the entire fence, thus remove the problem.
A few months later the insurance company followed up saying we needed to provide proof of the repaired fence. I politely told her, we decided to just remove the fence instead.
This seemed to confuse her....

Agent: You mean, you didn't fix the fence?
Me: Nope, we just took it down. We plan to re-do the whole backyard anyways in another year. Seemed pretty pointless. 
Agent: So there's no fence?
Me: No 
Agent: Then what do you have there?
Me: Nothing. Its just open. 

<....awkward pause....>

Me: Do we need to have a fence?
 Agent: Well, no, I guess not. 
Me: So do you just want me to send you a picture of the empty land where the fence was?
Agent: Um...

<....awkward pause....>

Agent: Let me ask my manager and get back to you.

A few days later I was asked to send a picture of the empty land where the fence once was showing that there was no longer a fence. See? Don't we all feel safer now. 

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